Robi Ludwig, Psy.D. is a nationally known psychotherapist, award-winning reporter, and author. She is a relationship contributor for Investigation Discovery Network’s Scorned, and has hosted TLC’s reality show One Week to Save Your Marriage and GSN’s Without Prejudice? Dr. Ludwig is a regular guest on CNN, Fox News, and Headline News, discussing psychological and lifestyle issues as well as the criminal mind. She has appeared on Today, Entertainment Tonight, 20/20, World News Tonight, Nightline, The View, Fox and Friends, Steve Harvey, The Wendy Williams Show, and is on the medical board and a contributor for BELLA Magazine. She also writes for the Huffington Post. Dr. Ludwig lives in New York City.
Dr. Robi Ludwig helps Bob Shuman through the golden years, in the final part of her Stage Voices interview.
One quality a survivor in the aging wars must cultivate?
I see two qualities being crucial: cultivating a little bit of moxie–and resiliency!
What are people missing about themselves, people who do feel that age is creeping up on them?
I’m not sure that people are missing anything, but there is a culturally induced fear about aging—somehow we believe we will become less in some way: less relevant, less wanted, less noticed.
This is what I address in Your Best Age Is Now, that we are improving in so many ways as we age. We continue to make new brain cells, showing that we are not “losing it”; many midlifers describe feeling more confident. We are able to problem-solve better; we become wiser and better able to plug into what’s important. We know what we want out of life and from the people in our lives. Many even describe themselves as getting better with age: having a better body, and looking better. Our personalities continue to change all the way into our 60s. We become more conscientious and agreeable. Due to the changes going on in our brains, we become more likely to see the world and the people in our world through a more optimistic lens.
How would you advise a woman who wants to–or has to–change careers after age 50 and is scared?
Don’t follow your fear, follow your plan.
It’s important to do some preliminary research about the field you’d like to go into.
Reach out to any connections you’ve made over the years who might be able to help you. Sometimes it’s our acquaintances who are the most helpful when it comes to providing new connections.
Don’t give up your day job before you fully explore what opportunities are available.
And be willing to get some experience via exploring this new career, as a hobby or via an internship. Sometimes volunteering one’s time can lead to the perfect opportunity for that new career transition.
Are women’s concerns about aging differently than men’s?
I think women in the past had it harder than men. Society was certainly tougher on the aging woman than the aging man. But things have changed. Men can be just as hard on themselves about the aging process
What do you recommend to your clients—or what do you see as first steps that they are taking—to break the cycle of being defined by age?
First, I advise them to get acquainted with the new science about midlife. It’s a lot more positive than what we’ve been led to believe. Then, it’s important to get in touch with your teen energy, since there are similarities between midlife and adolescence:
-Learn how to say “Yes” to life
-Get in touch with your inner moxie
-Find both older and younger role models
-Live with a “You Only Live Once” attitude
-And surround yourself with supportive friends and family
We really do lead more with our essence than our age. I think this is an important point for all of us to keep in mind.
How do you beat feelings of age, should they come up?
I follow the advice in my book Your Best Age is Now, and I continue to follow my passions and the fun in life.
Who did you give a copy of your book to at the holidays?
I gave a copy to some of my closest friends: mother and sister, and they were both very appreciative.
Thank you so much for talking with us.
View Your Best Age Is Now, from HarperOne, on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Your-Best-Age-Now-Soul-Satisfying/dp/0062357190/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490750224&sr=8-1&keywords=your+best+age+now
Visit Dr. Ludwig’s Web site: http://drrobiludwig.com/
Read Part 1 of the Dr. Ludwig interview: http://stagevoices.com/2017/03/29/robi-ludwig-on-time-the-psychotherapist-thinks-through-the-aging-crisis-counters-hollywood-expiration-dates-and-celebrates-the-new-release-of-her-paperback-edition-of-you/
(c) 2017 by Robi Ludwig, Psy.D (answers) and Bob Shuman (questions). All rights reserved.